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    Widows (2018)

    Four women who are left with nothing but debt after their husbands died in a heist are pulling a heist of their own to reclaim their lives.

    Based on the homonymous 1983 British series, Widows (2018) takes the fight from London to Chicago. The ensemble cast delivers astonishing performances, with Viola Davis and Robert Duvall standing out. The powerful opening chase sequence promises an action-packed drama to keep you on the edge of your seats. It is a promise that doesn’t deliver, though.

    It is not the first and certainly will not be the last time a European or an East Asian director goes to Hollywood. See, for example, actor/director Mathieu Kassovitz and Babylon A.D. (2008) or Jee-woon Kim and The Last Stand (2013). One-way ticket back… Even though Widows is nowhere near as bad as the aforementioned films (by brilliant directors) or the reviews surrounding it, it lacks the Steve McQueen, fine art training, personality, and idiosyncrasy.

    It lacks the suffering of 12 Years a Slave (2013), Shame‘s (2011) internal struggle, and Hunger‘s (2008) brutal realism. Maybe his first cut (around 3 hours long) offered all of the above and more. Regardless, I really look forward to McQueen’s next film, European, American, or otherwise.

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    Butterfly Kisses (2018)

    A filmmaker puts together a bunch of old tapes he found in a basement that belonged to two students and does a documentary on them and their research on an urban legend called Peeping Tom.

    Erik Kristopher Myers writes, directs, and takes to the next level a “found footage” horror on a story that we have watched before, but he is doing it his way. As the late Wes Craven did in 1996 with Scream, Myers puts under the microscope and questions the cinematic taboos that regulate the subgenre:

    • Using handheld shots, he avoids and criticises the nauseous, shaky camera.
    • He shows an understanding and endorses the public’s reaction towards something they don’t understand by doing what Doubting Thomas did in the Bible.
    • He somehow manages to market his film on IMDb as a documentary/horror with certain characters portraying allegedly themselves.
    • He adds extra layers and depth by jumping on board himself and making a film on a documentary that researches a documentary on a student project (very Inception).
    • Last but not least, he interviews Matt Lake and Eduardo Sanchez, authors of Weird Maryland and writer/director of Blair Witch Project, respectively, deconstructing the “found footage” and urban legends.

    Don’t try straight away to focus on or attack its originality. Romantic comedies (which I find appalling) are all more or less the same, but people watch them. “Slasher” horrors have been out there for many more decades than the “found footage” ones, yet people still watch them. And still, “alien” films dominate the sci-fi genre. Anyway, you get the gist.

    Is Butterfly Kisses flawless? Definitely not. Has Myers utilised his nano-budget in the best possible way? Definitely yes. Also, “Blink Man” doesn’t make it to the level of other urban legends such as “Candyman”, “Boogeyman” or “Babadook” for example. All three of them have a decent budget and distribution, and we can only hope that Myers starts something that will get noticed by the right people who will hire him to scare the s%!% out of us in the future.

    Orson Wells (on the radio), Dean Alioto, Eduardo Sanchez, and Oren Peli… all of them have offered and contributed to the “found footage” horror their way. Erik Kristopher Myers takes the torch now, and I, for one, look forward to watching his next film.

    P.S. Panasonic DVX 100 was also the camera I used in 2005 as a cameraman.

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    The Girl in the Spider’s Web (2018)

    The infamous computer hacker Lisbeth Salander teams up again with journalist Mikael Blomkvist and NSA agent Ed Needham to take down cybercriminals and Stockholm’s worst called “The Spiders”.

    When the trailer was initially released, the first comment was: “The film no one asked for…”. Sony, to secure the rights for the film, acquired the rights for the fourth book, which was not written by the late Stieg Larsson. A direct sequel to The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011), the film bypasses two books and here’s what happened to both character and story:

    Salander here is not a victim anymore but a vigilante. If there were a bat suit anywhere, you would be watching Batgirl. She knows how to fight, shoot, and race on a WRC level. She knows how to hack your phone, computer, and car from a Nokia 6110 while beating chess Grandmaster Garry Kasparov. She can find in time dozens of dildos and use them to turn an airport upside down to free an NSA agent that she doesn’t know where he is. What can I say? It makes me look my uselessness in the eye and jump out of the window.

    Story-wise, it gets better… Wanting to keep a low profile, she steals a brand-new Lamborghini. She deals with a computer program that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. All clues are placed conveniently in plain sight where they can be found by anyone, yet no one finds them except the right person at the right time (it’s called a gimmick). The villain doesn’t show any qualities to match Salander’s (superhuman) level. Other than she has suffered, we never find out anything about her capabilities other than she can put together and lead the toughest and remorseless criminals who wouldn’t hesitate to chop off your face.

    Claire Foy is an extremely charismatic and diverse actress who does a brilliant job here. However, the story and character development don’t give her much to work with. If you are a fan of Lakeith Stanfield, watch Sorry to Bother You (2018). As for Fede Alvarez, I highly recommend Evil Dead (2013) and Don’t Breath (2016). Gory!

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    RocknRolla (2008)

    A gang of lowlife crooks called the Wild Bunch, with the help of an accountant, steal money from a Russian developer that was meant for a London mob boss who has a drug addict, troubled stepson.

    What could go wrong, right?! Storytelling like Guy Ritchie only knows how to deliver! RocknRolla makes it to my list of the top 3 Guy Ritchie films, followed by Snatch (2000) and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998). The editing controls the information exactly as it should have and enhances the humorous side of a British action/crime. Gerald Butler, Tom Wilkinson, Thandie Newton, Idris Elba, Mark Strong, Tom Hardy, and Toby Kebbell work brilliantly together and clash with each other, adding 100% A-list British quality acting.

    In a different context now… What could go wrong, right?! People! People didn’t bother. I can only assume that one reason is “seen it all before”. But it isn’t. It is snappy, surrealistic, stylish, quirky, Cockney, and adds to the formula. Yet, what was meant to be a trilogy will never be. Our loss. Favourite scene: Robbing the Russians for the second time. Priceless!

    Join me in filing a petition for the “Real RocknRolla”!!!

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    Replicas (2018)

    After losing his family in a car accident, a synthetic biologist breaks every physical law and ethical barrier to bring them back.

    I’ll get right to the point… One of the early debates in the film is between Will Foster – the scientist – and his wife Mona about the existence or not of the “soul”. I don’t know about humans, but Replicas definitely lacks it. Writer Chad St. John seems to know about the tech side of the film, but he, director Jeffrey Nachmanoff and the production team seem to neglect the emotional side: the feeling of desolation that absolutely ruins a man upon losing his family, the feeling of joining them, the feeling of lying down and not getting up ever. Much less, not lying down at all and having the clarity to apply science levels you have never applied before. Especially from Chad St. John I would expect more as he also wrote Peppermint (2018) where he emphasised a lot on the assassination of Riley North’s (Jennifer Garner) family and the soul-crushing aftermath.

    And from an allegedly thought-provoking sci-fi/drama, it turns into action… I don’t want to keep on going; you got the gist. Replicas is a messy, soulless film that the cast and crew didn’t believe in, from pre- to postproduction. It could have been a lot more. Shame.

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    Polar (2019)

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    Just before retirement, an ageing assassin gets double-crossed and becomes the job.

    How much do you want to forget your problems? If the answer is “I can’t put it into words”, this one is for you! In two hours of shooting, killing, torturing, f@#!$%, and cursing, Polar recruits every cliche under the sun that every film of that magnitude has delivered over the past four decades. Now, the funny thing is that it is absolutely enjoyable. Probably not the best way to adapt Dark Horse’s homonymous graphic novel “Polar: Came from the Cold” as it doesn’t really take itself seriously – which is fine – but, on occasion, it resembles a humorous parody. Oh well… from the opening scene, you know exactly what you are getting into.

    Mads Mikkelsen was one of the three reasons why I watched it, and with Katheryn Winnick and Vanessa Hudgens being the second and the third, I got a bit disappointed as they were highly underused. Winnick is an extremely talented martial artist who could have been the main villain, giving Mikkelsen a good run for his money. As for Hudgens, she needed a lot more screen time as she is an extremely talented actress and amazing woman who must have made a tremendous effort to make herself look like an ordinary girl. And even then, it is impossible not to stand out.

    That kind of storyline has been beaten to death. Only a few weeks ago, I watched and reviewed Asher (2018) and straight away, I thought it was the same but more surrealistic and brutal version of that. And then Richard Dreyfuss shows up in the exact same role!!!

    If you want to watch an equally graphic but much more realistic action/crime adaptation, go for Marvel’s series The Punisher (2017). Hands down!

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    Okja (2017)

    A little girl is trying to prevent a sketchy multinational company from kidnapping Okja, her genetically modified pet and best friend.

    It would be great if Okja were “R” rated. To properly reveal what humans and animals alike mean to most multinational companies and organisations. Bong Joon Ho, behind the camera, holds back to a certain extent but captures the essence nevertheless. Brad Pitt and Netflix in the production back him up, and Seo-hyun Ahn, Tilda Swinton, Jake Gyllenhaal and Paul Dano in front of the lens support a vision that we all need to stop turning a blind eye to. I salute the cast and crew and pay my respects to them as they all give us a mild lesson on the paranoia behind a colossal company’s beautiful facade, fancy logo, and unfathomably brainless slogan.

    The Animal Liberation Front exist, they are a real, leaderless organization, fight for animal rights all around the globe, and they are not as funny as they are portrayed in the film. Even so, Okja should be for everyone to watch and get an idea of how filthy and disgusting the mammoth food corporations are.

    Booed at least three times at the Cannes Film Festival just for being Netflix, Okja itself does not deserve booing. I’m staying out of this political side of cinema, as whoever gets in the middle gets caught in the crossfire of the Industry Giants’ war for money and power. Streaming vs. theatre, which productions deserve to go to which festival, and why is not for us to decide, and it has nothing with us anyway.

    You wanna see the real “R” rated version of Okja? Watch Earthlings (2005), and feel free to be ashamed. And cry your eyes out. I quit meat that very same day and wholeheartedly apologised for being human. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BrlBSuuy50Y

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    Close (2019)

    With no one to turn to and no one to trust, a female bodyguard must protect a rich, young heiress in Casablanca when kidnappers go after her.

    Think of it as a female version of Man on Fire (2004) that takes out most of the Hollywood aspects regarding character and story development. With no cheesy lines or slow-mo for dramatic effect, Close is loosely based on Jacquie Davis, a world-class bodyguard who, in the last 30 years, has been “stabbed, shot at, and thrown through a window”  protecting from the Beckhams to the royal family.

    The editing controls the pace, balances action and drama, moves the story forward, and reveals the information when it needs to be revealed. Also, the amazing cinematography and Vicky Jewson’s directing allow Noomi Rapace and Sophie Nélisse to develop their amazing acting skills. Needless to say, given the right training, project, and budget, Rapace can prove herself to being top-notch action heroin as (among others) Charlize Theron and Uma Thurman have in Atomic Blonde (2017) and Kill Bill (2003) respectively.

    Netflix productions can go either way. Close went the right way, and we can only hope they produce more heartfelt action/thriller films with humanised heroes and heroines like this one.

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    This is England ’83 / ’86 / ’88 / ’90

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    “Combo: Men have laid down their lives for this. For this… and for what? So people can stick their fucking flag in the ground and say, “Yeah! This is England (pointing to the ground). And this is England (pointing to the heart)! And this is England (pointing to the mind)!”

    Danny Cohen’s ’80s grainy cinematography and Ludovico Einaudi’s heartbreaking soundtrack accompany Midlander Shane Meadows, who creates a tear-jerking life drama based on his childhood experiences that debuted and elevated actors who were introduced to the world. Thomas Turgoose, Joseph Gilgun, Jack O’Connell – whose part was written specifically for him, Andrew Shim, Vicky McClure, who, as the years pass by, turns into a more and more magnificent actress and woman, Rosamund Hanson, Chanel Cresswell, Michael Socha, and Andrew Ellis get into the role and truly become the everyday heroes you see on camera. The amazing Stephen Graham and Johnny Harris need no introductions.

    Straight from the kick-off, the opening credits, archive footage, and montage spanning from the Falklands War to Knight Rider (1982) pretty much sums up the story of the sociopolitical situation in England but also the world in the ’80s. Shaun, Milky, Lol, Woody, Smell, Gadget, Trev, Kelly, Lenny, Pukey, and Bully all go through a rite of passage: the inescapable process of becoming men and women. And share the story of a lifetime. The references are from the film and the mini-series, starting from ’83 until ’90. I believe I’ve kept all spoilers out. If you haven’t watched it, I hope they pique your interest. If you have, I hope you see where I’m coming from.

    “Woody (to Milky): You are a fucking snake in the grass… We were brothers… I would have died for you… I would have fucking died for you… I fucking loved you!!!”

    This is England is a state of mind that divides what would have been an otherwise carefree, bonded, random ragtag bunch of skinheads and ska lovers living in ‘Thatcherland’. A mentality that consists of politics, economy, race, generation gaps, and religion that may be translated as “This is [YOUR COUNTRY OF ORIGIN]”.

    There are some astonishing cinematic moments that make both the film and mini-series a league of their own.

    • The detestable Combo, whose brutal, cowardly attack leaves a young, black kid half-dead.
    • Whenever he shows up, Mick (the brilliant Johnny Harris) makes your guts twirl.
    • The dramatic moment where Lol confronts Mick.
    • Combo’s brass balls are the ultimate sacrifice for love.
    • The intense moment when Woody confronts Milky and the gang on the street.
    • Woody reunites with the repentant Combo upon the latter’s release.
    • The house dinner’s revelation (Chanel Cresswell is simply mesmerising).
    • Milky puts the final nail in the coffin, facing the hero in our eyes, Combo, who strives to keep a stiff upper lip.

    This is England

    It is the domestic violence that knocks on the door of every single household that has faced it.

    The decency of everyday people you probably have never met and maybe you never will who always had next to nothing yet were always wealthier.

    The pride of every English football fan has over the national team making it to the World Cup.

    The genuine British humour that has always been part of but also characterised British society.

    The vast diversity of accents makes this island unique.

    It is the everyday struggle to keep the head above water.

    It is the everyday struggle to keep the head above water and, against all odds, somehow, find the courage to move on.

    It is the English responses, reactions, idiosyncrasies, and mannerisms that you’ll find nowhere else, exhibiting England to the world with the purpose of understanding rather than judging.

    It is the forgiveness some people never gave, and some people never received.

    “Combo: I forgive you… I just hope one day you’ll be able to forgive me…”

    This is England pointing to the ground, to the heart, to the mind. It starts off as a racist interpretation at the beginning of the journey, only to become the harsh realization of life when it remorselessly pins you against the wall. Combo’s (Stephen Graham) monologues and outbursts are phenomenal and his path is the cornerstone of this journey. You will initially hate him with a passion, only to feel for him wholeheartedly in the end.

    There are innumerable moments of English realism throughout the film and series where you will find yourself confused as to which utterances, actions, and reactions are scripted and which ones aren’t. This is England could as well be a sociological docudrama on Thatcherite England and life itself.

    An unknown journey of happiness drowning in sorrow…

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    Suspiria (2018)

    Berlin 1977: A girl arrives at a world-renowned dancing school only to discover obscure entities harbouring haunting secrets.

    Suspiria is a prime example of the endless highbrow/lowbrow “battle”. The reviews escalate from 1/10 to 10/10 and back in the blink of an eye. It is not for everyone! Expel the Hollywood narrative prior to entering into this world of darkness. Know the kind of films you like and the kind you don’t. Have you ever seen me reviewing a comedy/romance? I would come back and slate every frame of it. But I’ve said before, I’m not here to slate films. I’m reviewing their parameters and examining their intentions. Pick a narrative you like and should you choose to go for something different, which I highly recommend every now and again, don’t rip it apart straight after.

    Even though a remake of Dario Argento’s Suspiria (1977), Luca Guadagnino’s homonymous paganistic world runs almost a full hour longer than the original, acting more as exploration or expansion and preparation for the “Three Mothers” trilogy (Make sure to stay for the post-credits scene).

    If you like watching a film and paying attention to details simultaneously, then directing, photography, and certain montage sequences, i.e. Susie dancing and Olga… suffering, will blow your mind away. If you are also into experimental cinema, you’ll love the storytelling and, consequently, the film as a whole.

    I knew Dakota Johnson had had her big breakthrough with the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy, but as I really tried and failed to watch even the first one, I was not familiar with her acting skills. Here, she definitely commits to the project and proves herself more than worthy. She completed two years of ballet training prior to taking this role and excels at her diversity, and I take my hat off to her.

    Then there is the one and only Tilda Swinton, who, like the amazing Kate Blanchet, can master any role as a woman as much as a man of her age, younger, older, or really freaking old. In this instance, she is three entirely different characters. I couldn’t admire her more. Plus, she just doesn’t get old! She is like a female Keanu Reeves!!!

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    Glass (2019)

    A security guard with extraordinary abilities tracks down a dangerous man with twenty-four personalities while the mastermind patiently awaits.

    Nineteen years later, Glass finally makes it to the big screen only to give some answers and raise more questions. M. Night Shyamalan’s heroes and villains from Unbreakable (2000) and Split (2016) are brought together, unite, believe and doubt themselves and each other, and eventually clash. Here’s what happened straight after the film was released: It was pounded by the critics and deified by the audience. I guess the truth lies somewhere between the two extremes.

    The pace is the main issue. The two hours seem significantly longer as the first act seems a bit rushed, whereas the second, due to the lengthy psychotherapeutic verbosity that ostensibly leads nowhere, drags and feels like a marathon. As for the third act, since it’s a Shyamalan film, I can’t say anything without giving away spoilers. What I can say, though, is that certain concerns regarding the unbelievability of certain events and events give the trilogy a whole new direction you will either love or hate. It was a bold move, but, at the end of the day, that’s Shyamalan for you.

    Another issue is Mr. Glass’s character development. He has become as intelligent as the script needs him to be, which is partially why the story is led in a certain direction that, on occasion, lacks common sense. Then there is the when and how everything is happening: the timing, the understaffed hospital, the low security, the underdeveloped final clash…

    BUT… don’t go in there with your own expectations of how you would like it to begin, develop, or end. Remember that with Shyamalan’s films, one can only wonder if what they are watching is the end or merely the beginning. If it helps, focus on the breathtaking acting… The, once again, meticulously chosen hero colour pattern… The directing and the photography which makes it a world-class thriller. And keep in mind that the characters from Unbreakable (2000) and Split (2016) belong to two different studios which collaborated for the first time (and, according to Shyamalan, probably the last) to bring this project to life. So, a lot of Industry Professionals truly believed in it.

    Think of Glass as a confrontation of a man’s ultimate altruism against another man’s monstrosity, orchestrated by a third man who believes that humans would be physically and mentally capable of everything… if they only knew how to trigger their true identity.

    Or don’t think of any reviews or critiques; go and watch it and see for yourselves…

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    Split (2016)

    A man with 23 personalities kidnaps three girls who must find a way out before the 24th is unleashed.

    Sixteen years after Unbreakable (2000), and just before the end credits started rolling down, we all discovered this was a (first) sequel. M. Night Shyamalan managed to keep us on the edge of our seats, and once we said the first ‘WOW’, we realised what the marketing had managed to do. Then, the second followed. Not included in the shooting script and omitted from the test screenings, the last scene was kept under wraps and is the tie-in between the two films. Kevin Crumb was written originally for Unbreakable, only to be seen in this one.

    Based on a real-life person who actually had 24 personalities, Split‘s Kevin Crumb suffers the same problem even though we get to see 9 of them on screen. Interestingly enough, Unbreakable‘s David Dunn is also based on a real-life person. Hmmm…

    Split, as a standalone, is a brilliant psychological horror/thriller. James McAvoy does all the heavy lifting, and the extremely talented Anya Taylor-Joy gives him all the support he needs. Depending on the personality that takes over, you feel for him as much as you hate him.

    Experts in the Psychology field could argue how much M. Night Shyamalan knows about dissociative identity disorder and the compartmentalisation and segregation of personalities, but don’t let that distract you. Remember that it’s a psychological horror/thriller, not a documentary or a docudrama. I’ve watched documentaries propagandising inconceivable political and religious nonsense parroting biased and fallacious “facts”. Split is meant to give you the chills, and that’s exactly what it does.

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    Unbreakable (2000)

    A comic book gallery owner discovers that the lone survivor of a horrible accident has an amazing ability.

    It is only befitting to review this one at this point in time. You know which one is going to be next! Now that Glass (2019) has been heavily promoted as the third part of an otherwise stealthy trilogy, Unbreakable has been given a lot more gravitas.

    When it was first released in 2000, some people loved it, some laughed at it, and some were just left scratching their heads. I will avoid major spoilers about the ending just in case someone hasn’t watched it yet. As a standalone, there was really no closure. When it comes to ‘Mr. Glass’ justice was served. But what about David Dunn? He finally found his calling, and then what? Was that the end of the hero’s journey? To discover an ability and do nothing with it afterwards?

    As part of a trilogy, the scope changes. It makes you now want to go back and watch it again, get to know the characters once more, and see how they can potentially be connected to the 24 personalities of Kevin Crumb in Split (2018) before you go to the cinema and watch Glass (2019). Remember the scene at the football stadium when David Dunn heads for the drug dealer? What if you suspected that the mother and child he brushes past and senses child abuse just before is believed to be little Kevin with his mom? Hmm…

    Anyway, Unbreakable is arguably M.Night Shyamalan’s most innovative and resourceful directing, Eduardo Serra’s darkest cinematography, and one of the best James Newton Howard’s score. It marks the fourth collaboration between Bruce Willis and Samuel Jackson, both irreplaceable. Memorable moments:

    • The hooded rain poncho and Dunn’s obscured face.
    • Long tracking shots and high and low camera angles create the illusion we are in a graphic novel.
    • Repeatedly seeing Mr Glass through or around the glass reminds us of his connection with it but also his weakness.
    • Respectively, the raincoat David Dunn wears in most scenes to “protect” himself from the rain (water).
    • The graphic novel’s colour patterns; Dunn wears green and Glass purple.
    • Speaking of, the saturated colours over the muted colours at the station.

    Unbreakable is not a superhero film but follows the hero’s self-discovery path. And even though it is not a graphic novel adaptation, it is most definitely made that way to “beam us up” to the narrative storytelling of the world of pictures.

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    Wildlife (2018)

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    The role of a mother in her son’s life changes unexpectedly after the father takes a dangerous job.

    I must have missed something here. The directing is great, the photography is stupendous, and the score is fantastic. The set decoration transports one back to the ’60s. Carey Mulligan and Jake Gyllenhaal clash on a Revolutionary Road (2008) level. So…

    I’ll be honest with you. I missed the point. I don’t know why I watched it, and I didn’t feel a thing in the end. Maybe the plethora of symbolisms passed me by. If the third act was different, maybe? If you do get to watch it, please comment on why this story is worth telling.

    Paul Dano and his other half, Zoe Kazan, work brilliantly together. Watch Ruby Sparks (2012); you’ll see what I mean. I haven’t read the book, so I can’t tell with certainty why I don’t get it, but the former’s directorial debut shows the potential of a great director who has already proven to be an amazing actor.

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    Minority Report: Visual Effects and Storytelling

    Constantine (2005)

    Occult detective John Constantine teams up with a policewoman when her sister allegedly committed suicide, and all hell breaks loose.

    Now, that’s how you adapt a graphic novel! Before Warner Bros and DC started getting those shockingly dreadful reviews, there was “Constantine”. Hardly a superhero, definitely an antihero, John Constantine exists in the DC Universe and kicks demonic and angelic ass in his own blunt, cynic, and supernatural way.

    Behind the camera, Francis Lawrence and his team write, edit, and direct an action/fantasy (although not horror, really) with a lot of humour, amazing photography, and great visual effects that help the story advance. If there were any gimmicks, flaws, or holes, you wouldn’t bother finding them, and even if you did, you would turn a blind eye as it is that enjoyable.

    In front of the lens, Keanu Reeves, Rachel Weisz, Djimon Hounsou, Shia LaBeouf, Pruitt Taylor Vince, Tilda Swinton, and Peter Stormare stand together and clash against each other, throwing countless punchlines and keeping you entertained for two solid hours. Well, if you are too religious, maybe not that entertained.

    Anyway, I give Warner Bros. my permission to hire Francis Lawrence and his crew back to rebuild DCCU.

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    The Village (2004)

    A late 19th-century, isolated Amish-like community lives by strict rules in a valley surrounded by forest, inhabited by creatures that don’t let them enter it.

    Box office-wise, it didn’t disappoint. M. Night Shyamalan’s reputation was not what it used to be after Signs (2002), but he was still the golden goose of Hollywood, and people were still fascinated by his third act’s twists. It was the reviews that didn’t do it any favours.

    I’ve blamed marketing before, and I strongly believe that this is one of them, too. Getting the crowd intrigued and messing up with their expectations are two different things, separated by an indistinct, fine line. In the end, it can go either way, which is why marketing’s job is so crucial.

    The photography is haunting, the score is Oscar-worthy, and the chemistry between Joaquin Phoenix and Bryce Dallas Howard electrifying. I will say nothing about the plot, as… it is up to you to figure that out.

    Watch it as you would The Twilight Zone (1959), having no expectations whatsoever, knowing that nothing is what it seems.

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    Sorry to Bother You (2018)

    In a parallel universe, in Oakland, a telemarketer goes from having nothing to having everything to losing it all over again when, in reality, he loses it all and then tries to gain it again.

    Is it perplexed? So is the film… Before I write any review, I make sure not to read other reviews or critiques so I know for a fact that I am stating my point of view and my point of view alone. Sorry to Bother You is “Comedy” and is “Fantasy”, but it is not “Sci-Fi”. It looks like a fresh take on Charlie Kaufman’s way of thinking, topped up with Boots Riley’s unique approach. Before watching it, the range of comments I had heard spanned from “genius” to “moronic” and from “amazing” to “horrendous”. So, chances are that you will either love it or loathe it. Here’s what I think…

    Cassius Green represents the number of times you have asked yourself, “Why does no one see how wrong the world is”? At first, he sees it. Then he becomes part of it. And then he wakes up, gets out, and does something about it. Lakeith Stanfield is brilliant as Cassius who lives in a surrealistically psychedelic world, like ours, just more artistically – Kaufman-esque – portrayed. Well, in our world, Donald Trump is the President of the United States of America, a laughable joke from The Simpsons (1989), so not that much more…

    Steve Lift (Armie Hammer) represents the system that feeds off greed. Our ambition to do something more with our lives, become something better, and change that system can fool even ourselves and become that very same greed that feeds it.

    Sorry to Bother You parodies our world not because it wants to undermine it. Boots Riley comprehends the “If you want to tell people the truth, you’d better make them laugh or they’ll kill you” (George Bernard Shaw) mentality, and through a respectful, meaningful, and didactic parable, makes you laugh but also “see” how much work needs to be done so our world can be a tad more understood.

    Last but not least, Detroit, who is none other than the one and only breathtaking and always dazzling woman and actress Tessa Thompson, represents love. In a subtle and artistic form, she has always been the one to prevent us from going astray and make us become the people that we always hoped we would be.

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    Stargate (1994)

    The discovery of a mysterious device in Egypt will teleport a linguist and a Colonel with a military mission galaxies away to a world where Ra rules over ancient civilization.

    Who built the pyramids? How were the pyramids built? When were the pyramids built? Blending history with fiction, Rolland Emmerich manages to build up an engaging premise surrounding the aforementioned questions, which, to this day, people post online or publish books and articles.

    Stargate has everything. Brilliant directing and photography, strong storyline, relatable characters, impressive visual and sound effects, great performances, excellent music score, and right editing pace. It is a solid sci-fi flick with no kitsch and no cliche, offering an entertaining take on Egyptian Mythology that will especially satisfy the thought-provoking conspiracy lovers believing that once the aliens paid us a visit. And not only.

    That said, between them and those who think that Stargate contains “Americans liberating the world” right-wing hidden messages, “religion is oppressive” beliefs, and “power to the people” left-wing ideologies… I’ll side with the “Aliens built the pyramids mirroring Orion” dudes…

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    In the Mouth of Madness (1994)

    A cynical insurance investigator is hired by a publishing company to find a disappeared, renounced horror writer while global psychosis starts plaguing his readers worldwide.

    I was a kid when I first saw it at the cinema. And then a young adult when I watched it in VHS. And here I am now, an adult, watching it on Blu-ray and feeling like a kid all over again. In the Mouth of Madness is one of John Carpenter’s best works, one of Sam Neil’s best performances, Michael De Luca’s best script, and, without a doubt, one of the best psychological horrors you will ever watch in your time. Fantasy and reality, sanity and insanity, pronoia and paranoia… all blend in to “bring to life” and pay tribute to H.P.Lovecraft’s horror fiction. It is probably the best film that has captured the essence of the abstruse and horrifying Cthulhu Mythos. I say nothing more. Turn the lights off and get sucked into madness!

    H.P. Lovecraft died in poverty, and he and his works were only recognised posthumously. In the Mouth of Madness, a homage to Lovecraft was not a commercial success, yet today, it is a critically acclaimed horror, a classic. I am so perplexed by what makes people tick most of the time. Like almost everything else in life, we learn the hard way and only when it’s too late – if that! Because it’s so hard to see what’s in front of our eyes the whole time and appreciate it while it’s there. Same with people…

    You know what? I’m gonna write the sequel and send it to New Line Cinema. F@!% it!

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    Asher (2018)

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    An ageing contract killer finds himself between a hard place and a rock during his final assignment, which forces him to reassess his life’s goals.

    I guess marketing is to blame here. The trailer promised an action film when, in reality, Asher is a drama. Ron Perlman gives an esoteric performance as Asher, who reevaluates his life, shows remorse, and hopes it is not too late to turn his life around. All that while falling in love with the personification of innocence (the always amazing Famke Janssen) and everyone trying to take him out.

    Pour some wine, put your feet on the table, and give it a go. Don’t expect a Michael Bay production where everything blows up; you might be surprised.

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    Bird Box (2018)

    In a post-apocalyptic present, a mother with two kids run for their lives as a menacing presence of unknown origin, when seen, forces people to take their own lives.

    Here’s the film’s obvious pitch: The Happening (2008) meets A Quiet Place (2018). Let me put it this way: It doesn’t meet either. Both raise important questions but provide, to a certain level, some answers, leaving the viewer speculating about the cause and effect based on the clues they provide.

    Bird Box raises questions and doesn’t bother at all with answers. No one with a basic level of intelligence will stare at the ceiling as the end credits roll down, contemplating what these entities (?) could potentially be. Not revealing them is absolutely fine in my books. The unseen yet sensed ominous presence can be terrifying indeed. Not revealing their origins, their purpose, their powers, nothing whatsoever, makes them as unrelatable as the characters themselves. So, yeah, there is that, too.

    Susanne Bier has done a terrific job behind the camera. Bird Box is a well-shot, well-edited, and well-produced film. So, I will quote (again) Howard Hawks: “You can’t fix a bad script after you start shooting. The problems on the page only get bigger as they move to the big screen”. Months before, Netflix also produced How It Ends (2018), with the reviews being as embarrassing as they come – especially on How It Ends! I guess history teaches us that we are not taught from history after all…

    Sandra Bullock is still an amazing actress and keeps nailing the parts she gets, even in this one. So, I really hope we see her in films she deserves to be in, not films like Ocean’s Eight (2018). Actually, I hope we never have to see any film like Ocean’s Eight (2018) again, not even blindfolded.

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    Crash (2004)

    People from every walk of life, dealing with loss, racism, and life itself, collide with each other in the city of Angels.

    Find the one you hate the most. You’ll like them later on. Find the one you relate with the most. You’ll hate them in the end. Welcome to a world where all East Asians are Chinese. All South Americans are Mexicans. All Middle Easterners are “Osama”. All blacks are criminals. And all whites are rednecks.

    Racism, bigotry, misanthropy… passed on from one to the next, by white to brown, to black to yellow, to another shade of skin colour and back to where it started, in an endless spiral of hatred that has no beginning but hopefully one day an end. Wait, there is more! Colour is not enough. Where do you stand in this world? Are you educated? What is your financial and societal status? You work for the government or against the government? Either way, you are a criminal. You have principles? How much?

    Crash includes an amazing ensemble cast and deeply explores the aforementioned, yet its message focuses on overcoming the notion that everyone is a victim, whoever is different is the enemy, and it is always someone else’s fault. People’s interconnectedness extends to their feelings, too; loss, love, pride, shame, isolation, belonging, loneliness, redemption and regret… all blend into one, making it easier to accuse everyone we don’t know for ostensibly having everything we always longed for. Until we realised we wanted more…

    Change will not happen miraculously. A legend said it once best: “I’m starting with the man in the mirror…”

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    Never Let Me Go (2010)

    Three kids who grew up together in a posh, strict, and ostensibly ordinary boarding school become young adults and face the life they were destined to have.

    How would you feel if you found out your whole life is already chosen for you? How about both chosen for you and a lie? Once, I thought that sci-fi without visual effects was like a lift without a mirror. How wrong was I?! Never Let Me Go is not the only film that makes it to that list. But it makes it to the top – in my humble opinion, anyway.

    Its strongest suits:

    • Kazuo Ishiguro’s powerful existential drama dives into the human psyche.
    • Carey Mulligan, Andrew Garfield, and Keira Knightley deliver electrifying performances.
    • Rachel Portman’s enthralling and spellbinding score.
    • Mark Romanek’s best film yet.

    The film’s pace might put the average viewer off. It is a slow burn, but it is important not only to understand the characters but also to become them. See life how they see it. Experience pain as they do. Be there for them when they curse the day they are brought to life.

    The book goes into deeper depth, analysing or emphasising characters and situations; that way, everything becomes clearer in the end. The film doesn’t; therefore, it raises more questions than answers.

    Be patient and pay attention to the details. With acting that brings tears to your eyes and a soundtrack that adds “hope, humanity, and heartbeat” in an alternate, seemingly heartless reality, Never Let Me Go is a depressingly beautiful cinematic adaptation that strikes a chord.

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    Edward Scissorhands (1990)

    Living on the top of a hill, Edward, who has scissors for hands, is initially welcomed but then abominated by a conservative society.

    Potentially, Tim Burton’s greatest fairy tale. One of Danny Elfman’s best film scores. Stefan Czapsky’s most wondrous cinematography. The film showcased Johnny Depp’s true thespian skills. The film that Winona Ryder made me fall in love with an actress for the first time. Dianne Wiest and Alan Arkin are amazing as gullible and naive parents, and both the visual and sound departments deliver a truly mesmerising result.

    As for the story and its development, please keep in mind that it is about Edward Scissorhands, who is… different. Through his eyes, we recognise isolation, seek self-discovery, and find love. Similar yet more sensitive to the story of Frankenstein, Edward Scissorhands could be more of a different take on Beauty and the Beast through German Expressionism enhanced with Gothic constituents.

    Try not to ask too many “whys”. Try not to rationalise actions and reactions. Try not to get too political or too scientific in diagnosing Edward with autism. This is one of the best modern love stories Hollywood has to offer. It is a magical love story…

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    Jumper (2008)

    A man with teleporting abilities, living a carefree life, gets caught in an ancient war between Jumpers and Paladins.

    There is a lot of negativity surrounding this film. It was meant to be a franchise, but the box office results scratched the idea off the producers’ minds. From where I stand, Michael Rooker has been under-utilized. For a guy who usually does the villain in the story, it’s really great to see him as a washed-up yet filled with remorse dad who pays the price. I would definitely want to see more of him on the screen. Samuel Jackson is always great but could have been even greater as the fanatic Paladin. Reciting passages from the Bible, like in Pulp Fiction (1994), would have elevated his character to the sky.

    Jamie Bell is always at his best, so there is nothing much to say, which leaves us with Hayden Christensen and Rachel Bilson (who got engaged after the film). Once again, there could have been a strong story between them – and an even stronger subtext for the film – after what happened in their childhood years.

    To cut a long story short, production and budgetary issues watered down what could have been a brilliant story and film. That said, it definitely deserves a watch, as you’ll spend an entertaining hour and a half forgetting about your own problems. For this one, my round of applause goes to the visual and sound effects department. Spot on!

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    Scrooged (1988)

    A cold-hearted, spiteful TV executive, hell-bent on ruining everyone’s Christmas around him, is paid a visit by three ghosts on Christmas Eve.

    A modern adaptation of Charles Dickens’s “A Christmas Carol”. Funny, emotional, and didactic, Scrooged will make you laugh but also mist your eyes. You’ll love every second of it. Bill Murray goes over the top and exceeds everyone’s expectations. Karen Allen is a beauty and makes you smile every time she does. Alfre Woodard is amazing, as always. Danny Elfman was, is, and always will be the master of Christmas scores. And last but not least, the incredibly versatile Richard Donner orchestrates this brilliant film giving it the befitting, illustrious style it deserves. Shame that he and Murray didn’t work well together. A massive round of applause goes out to all cast and crew for making this film a classic for us to enjoy to this very day and encouraging us to… put a little love in our hearts!

    I take my hat off to Richard Donner and everyone in the production team where, in the most festive period of the year, in one of the most troubled years of South Africa, in their way, they offer their support against the atrocity of apartheid.

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    Interview with the Vampire: The Vampire Chronicles (1994)

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    An epic vampire chronicle, from the moment he turned to the moment he found salvation.

    I would dare to say it was the best, atmospheric, captivating vampire film ever made. Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise. Dazzling Cinematography. Oscar nominating Art Direction-Set Decoration and Original Score. A Kirsten Dunst to give you the chills. 22 wins and 25 nominations well earned. A Neil Jordan masterpiece.

    Imagine a human being finding eternity. What would they do? How would they spend their time? What human values would they keep, and what human values would they discard? Interview with the Vampire sees and justifies eternity through a creature of a night that, legend has it, outlives us all. Louis and Lestat stand for the bright and dark side of what we call the “soul”. Choose a side, travel around the world, and be guided through the centuries. Debunk the myths, explore philosophical questions, find God if you can, and look for the meaning of life – if there is any.

    In a fictitious world, evil, non-human beings exist and live forever, wondering through perpetuity, neither knowing nor caring about racism or homosexuality. In our real world, we, the distinguishably separated from the animals and humans, with our very short given time on this Earth, why can’t we do the same?

    The film is dedicated to the late River Phoenix.

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    Filth (2013)

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    A mentally unstable, crooked, alcoholic, drug addict cop stops at nothing to get the promotion he is so passionate about while fighting his inner demons.

    I’ll start this way… James McAvoy was not my cup of tea until The Last King of Scotland (2006). By far not! After X-Men: First Class, I started changing my mind. After Filth, I knew I couldn’t have been more wrong. Or, actually, I had been wrong that much once more. With Leonardo DiCaprio after Gangs of New York (2002). But then all of us men were. So, I apologise to both.

    James McAvoy in Filth gave the best performance of his life in 2013. And John S. Baird directed the best film of his career, even though Cass (2008) was pretty amazing. Filth will make you laugh and cry, and it will make you laugh and cry again and again until you don’t know how to feel anymore about anyone. Based on the novel by Irvine Welsh, Filth is one of the best Scottish films since Trainspotting (1996), yet another novel by Irvine Welsh. Changing genre every five minutes, Filth is a dramatically funny, surrealistically twisted cinematic journey through the paranoia of a corrupted, deranged, bipolar cop that will drive you bonkers. It’s worth mentioning that Jim Broadbent, in the hallucinatory world, is scarily hilarious.

    McAvoy’s psychedelic performance here will prepare you for his cringing performance in Split (2016) and the upcoming Glass (2019). See how it all started…

    Fun fact: Trainspotting and Filth potentially coexist in the same universe.

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    Game Night (2018)

    A game night between a group of friends goes awry when one of the participants gets kidnapped by gangsters.

    It is exactly what you expect from a Jason Bateman comedy: foul language, surreal characters, brilliant chemistry between the actors, non-realistic yet comedic and graphic twists and turns, and shameless jokes. And, as there are a lot of game references, a really clever and befitting idea is the use of a “tilt-shift” lens, which gives the aerial shots the miniaturised look of the board game “Game of Life.”

    You loved The Switch (2010), Horrible Bosses (2011), Bad Words (2013), and the like? You’ll love Game Night too.

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    Franklyn (2008)

    Loss and despair connect four troubled souls in two intermingled, alternate realities.

    I have spoken of underrated films before, but Franklyn definitely gets the cake. I watched it almost ten years ago, and so much I wanted to talk about it with someone who had watched it as well. But no one had. And to this very day, hardly anyone still has.

    With exceptional intellectual ability, Gerald McMorrow is the artistic mind behind the camera who writes and directs something as unique as Franklyn. Despair, escalating to delusion, paranoia, and schizophrenia, all fester the human mind and soul, shape people’s fate, and twist (?) the concept of religion. In front of the camera, Eva Green, Ryan Phillippe, Sam Riley, Bernard Hill, and the late Susannah York will hold you spellbound with their performances.

    I want to share two strong elements in the film: the perception’s immense power and the father’s unconditional love.

    Franklyn is art. And like any other form of art, it examines the world through its own prism. I guess it is up to us to examine our world through our own life’s prism.

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    Mail Order Monster (2018)

    A little girl is trying to cope after having lost her mom while dealing with life itself, bullies, and her father with his new girlfriend by putting together… a robot.

    A low-budget, indie, PG film that Jax Productions and Stay Relevant Productions managed to bring to life with respect to family values. Loss, grief, rejection, love, and self-reflection have been responsible for causing all of us sleepless nights throughout the course of our lives. And Paulina Lagudi, with skill, imagination, and artistic temperament, produces, writes, and directs a heartfelt story on nights like that.

    Josh Hopkins does a brilliant job as a dad trying to do his best, and it’s really nice to see the always mesmerising Charisma Carpenter as the “woman next door” relying solely on her acting. Last but definitely not least, look out for the incredible Madison Horcher and Emma Rayne Lyle, who, given the opportunity, will be two of the most sought-after actresses of their age.

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    Bad Times at the El Royale (2018)

    Drew Goddard, ladies and gentlemen! Drew Goddard… From Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1996), to Alias (2001), to Lost (2004), to Daredevil (2015), Drew has contributed and made an impact on the TV series most of us grew up with and loved. But his talent is not restricted to TV. He wrote and produced The Martian (2015) for the big screen and got his first Oscar nomination. Before that, and I deliberately left this one for the end, he wrote and directed The Cabin in the Woods (2012). An absolute experience – a separate review will follow soon! So, what’s so special about El Royale?

    Directing, editing, cinematography, and soundtrack all work together confluently to bring the script’s crime, drama, and mystery to life. Dazzling and meticulous mise-en-scene accurately portraying the 1960s, rhythmically edited to a wonderful soundtrack, unfolding numerous vantage points, intricate timelines, and diverse, complex characters who play an integral part in the puzzle’s missing pieces.

    I’m not done yet. Jeff Bridges, Cynthia Erivo, Dakota Johnson, John Hamm, Cailee Spaeny, Lewis Offerman, and, last but not least, Chris Hemsworth shine on camera, creating unfathomable chemistry between them. Given the chance, I would happily do the lamppost.

    El Royale raises mysterious, fictional questions amalgamating with history, providing some answers yet leaving you with different (and maybe more) questions. Shut your phones, pay attention to the details, and above all, get sucked into this beautiful cinematic experience!

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    Bonded by Blood (2010)

    The third film on the Essex Boys murders after the Essex Boys (2000) and the Rise of the Footsoldier (2007). And it is absolutely brilliant! Gruesome violence, prison, dodgy deals, backstabbings, drugs, guns, vulgar language, and Vincent Regan, Tamer Hassan, Kierston Wareing, and Adam Deacon performing magic on camera. A brilliant year for Michael Socha as well, who jumped from this one to Shank (2010) and This Is England ’86 (2010).

    According to many (beyond my area of expertise), Essex wasn’t like this in the ’90s, which was held against the production design. Also, the massive script liberties annoyed certain people as it allegedly deviated from what really happened (which is still uncertain anyway).

    For all its quirks and foibles, Bonded by Blood is very enjoyable, and for its budget, it gives you one hell of a ride.

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    Scum (1979)

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    Welcome to THE most famous unnamed British Borstal of the ’70s, known today as “Young Offender’s Institution”.

    Based on the – banned from BBC – homonym TV film Scum ( 1977), Alan Clarke remade his own film two years later, which was characterized as one of the most controversial films of the ’80s. And became a cult. No music whatsoever, no glamourized violence, stronger inmates victimizing weaker inmates, racism, gruesome suicides, and more punchlines than anyone can memorize send a shockwave to the British system.

    I say no more. Scum is a must-see and the beginning of the brilliant career of beloved actor Ray Winstone. I would say “enjoy,” but it is not enjoyable.

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    Miracle on 34th Street (1994)

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    Christmas Version:

    An old man who fits the profile of Santa Claus becomes a symbol for a company, family, and nation.

    Richard Attenborough, Elizabeth Perkins, Dylan McDermott, and Mara Wilson give great performances in a film for the whole family. Legendary John Hughes, behind the production, and director Les Mayfield remake the 1947 version of the homonym film with humour, fantasy, great photography, camera work, and editing. Gather the family and enjoy!

    Non-Christmas Version:

    An old chap found on the street, who has not been vetted whatsoever and officially claims he is Santa is trusted by a family, a major company, and a nation to be near kids.

    My, oh, my… Folks gather around! A major company whose CEO’s last name is “Cole” hires a guy for its representative, Santa Claus, who looks like the 1930s Santa Claus, property of Coca-Cola—”Coke.” And all of us worldwide, to this very day, religiously, still pass the same torch from generation to generation.

    But our generation is evolutionary! We keep walking while texting towards the third decade of the 21st century with our wireless headphones on because seeing and listening in life is for the backwards-looking.

    Merry – Coca Cola’s – Christmas!

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    The Appearance (2018)

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    When I read the logline, I said: “This is not another Nun (2018), is it”? I didn’t create this blog to slate films. Sometimes, though, there is only so much one can do. Anyhow, I dug a bit deeper and said: “Why don’t I give it a shot”? And I did. So, this is how it goes: A medieval monk is found brutally murdered in a remote monastery, and the Church sends an Inquisitor to investigate it.

    This low-budget, one-location film shows right off the bat that it is good value for money. Brilliant camera work and photography, minimum editing mistakes, and convincing acting synthesise a horror/thriller that raises questions such as “Is she a witch? “Has she made a pact with the devil? “Whodunnit? “Are the Church’s representatives so… (fill in the blank accordingly)?”

    For its money, the cast and crew deserve a resounding “congratulations”! Very meticulously made film. But (thankfully, much later than The Nun) The Appearance, unfortunately, doesn’t escape and falls into the pit of ambiguity and cliche. I got the idea that there was this indecisiveness on how the film needs to end and why. But I got sucked into the story, nevertheless.

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    A Prayer Before Dawn (2017)

    Dynamite!!! A film that doesn’t beautify violence and criminality. A true story that doesn’t glorify bad choices yet creates a hero through them. Through real mud, blood, piss, and shit, A Prayer Before Dawn tells the real story of British boxer Billy Moore who rose from it like Phoenix. Incarcerated in one of Thailand’s most infamous prisons, Billy Moore found the courage to reflect on his life, learn from mistakes in the worst possible manner, and literally punch his way out of there.

    Shot with real Thai ex-inmates, (deliberately) occasionally subtitled, A Prayer Before Dawn breaks all Hollywood taboos. There are no easy ways out – actually, there is no way out – shockingly violent, hellish scenes that pass on the fear and agony that Moore had to endure and masterfully crafted realistic, ostensibly non-choreographed fights. Moore, trained by the natives, showed them how it’s done in a close-to-dying status.

    Practising muay thai myself for almost twenty years, I have the deepest respect for Billy Moore, who teaches, other than the martial art itself, life lessons on perseverance, human values, weaknesses and strengths, physical and emotional torture, regret, acknowledgement, paying back society, and more. I take my hat off to you, Billy.

    Last but not least, I applaud Joe Cole for his astounding performance. Look forward to seeing him in more brilliant films like this one.

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    A-X-L (2018)

    I’ll be quick, and as this is a PG film, I’ll be lenient too…

    Writing an “original” script nowadays is hard enough. Directing it in an “original” way is even harder. Oliver Daly, writer/director of the short film Miles (2015), pens the script and directs its feature version, A-X-L. A kid and (not) his robotic dog’s adventure can be pretty much summarized as E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982) meets Transformers (2007).

    It’s a decent story, offering nothing much to its development or its characters with more holes than a Swiss cheese that a kid would scratch its head. I know women who would die to find out how, after 48 hours of running around, the makeup stays intact and the hair straight as an arrow. And I’ll sound like a broken record again, but… Producers… don’t hire only underwear models.

    David S. Goyer has been a brilliant writer and producer for the past three decades and still is. I guess hit-and-miss is part of every job.

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    Brawl in Cell Block 99 (2017)

    Remember the “Wedding Crashers” (2005)? “The Break-Up” (2006)? “Couples Retreat” (2009)? Forget about them! And forget about that Vince too! Writer/Director S. Craig Zahler knocks on Vince Vaughn’s door:

    S: Hey, pal! Fancy making you look like tough as nails? Kick ass like it has never been kicked before?

    V: Oh… WOW… How?

    S: Right, check this story, yeah? You were a boxer, now you are a mule, and you get arrested. What happens next is a helluva new level of improbability that no one will give two s@£$% as you’ll be bashin’ heads in, smashin’ bones, ripping jaws, and more, with bare hands. What you sayin’, bro?

    V. Uhmm… Give me a couple of days to talk about it with Ben (Stiller) while playing dodgeball.

    OK… maybe it’s not exactly how it happened. What happened, though, prior to filming, was Vince Vaughn training for three months as a boxer, putting on fifteen pounds of muscle. And I kid you not, the final cut is an impressively choreographed, R-rated, constant, bloody, brutal brawl that will keep you entertained for over two hours.

    Vince Vaughn is an equally brilliant comedian as he is a tragedian. He delivered an astounding performance in True Detective (2015) and does the same here. On the other hand, the writer/director of Bone Tomahawk (2015) is an expert in raw violence, and I, for one, am really looking forward to Dragged Across Concrete (2018).

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    Contratiempo (2016)

    A young, successful businessman teams up with a lawyer who comes to his rescue only three hours before charges are pressed for murdering his mistress.

    This is what you are getting into:

    • Twist after twist after twist in a story where truths and lies are deceitful and interchangeable!
    • Numerous vantage points raise “what happened” and “whodunnit” questions from the beginning till the end.
    • Missing parts of an intricate puzzle that its pieces are scattered over an uneven canvas.

    Contratiempo (The Invisible Guest) is a labyrinthine and meticulously crafted journey seeking the truth. Writer/Director Oriol Paulo, following the mind-bending success of El Cuerpo (2012), sets the foundation, slowly and carefully builds up and unfolds tension, and finishes with a hair-raising, jaw-dropping third act to remember. Take your hats off to acting, photography, and music. Absolutely blazing!!!

    I’m not giving anything away. Get comfy, grab a cuppa/coffee/booze/whatever floats your boat, turn the lights off, put your phone on silent, and… Shhh! It started.

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    Searching (2018)

    A parent’s greatest fear!

    Having seen his wife lose the battle with cancer, a man does everything in his power to find his missing daughter.

    From a storytelling point of view, Searching is spot on. The right pace, believable dialogue, attention to detail, and twists and turns keep you on the edge of your seat. Then, John Cho’s performance is outstanding. You feel his agony and pain throughout the film.

    From a technical point of view, I prefer the “hand-held” kind of shooting, especially in dramatic situations like this one. Adds a lot more… “depth”. Searching is the new sub-genre of films called “Computer-Screen”. Following the path of similar films like Megan is Missing (2011) and Unfriended (2014), Searching resurfaces the power but also the vulnerabilities of the internet and social media. What’s more, the true naivety in human nature. I hope, at least, watching films like this one, people start thinking twice before the “knight in shining armour” shows up out of the blue online, promising compassion, money, happiness or whatever else the internet predators promise.

    The “Computer-Screen” sub-genre reminds me of the “Found Footage”, which started off really well, showing tremendous potential, but it was then beaten to death in horrors and sci-fi films that were vomiting, and the camera shake made you vomit some more. Just for the sake of “Oh! People like it. Let’s apply it everywhere”. I’ve spoken before about some producers so… Hopefully, with this kind of film, they’ll be more careful even though I sincerely doubt it.

    Enjoy Searching before certain people smell its success like flies around s#@%.

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    Kin (2018)

    Mysterious humanoid entities, a vindictive gang, and the authorities are after a young man who just came out of prison and his little brother, who is in possession of a hyper-advanced weapon.

    With a heavy heart, I inform you that Kin is a solid film. So why’s that, uh? Because it tanked! And we won’t see more of it! Homage to The Terminator (1984) and Aliens (1986) (both by James Cameron), Kin flies entirely under the radar and massively underdevelops at the box office. Really shame! I would love to have watched it at the cinema as both the visual and sound effects are imposing, but I was totally oblivious to its existence. Well, I guess it would be better if it weren’t for the critics once more. You know what… I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve spoken about it.

    And if you are wondering, “What are you doing then?” I’m telling you that I may be reviewing films, but it is their intentions that I criticise and I’m after. And Kin, even though flawed, it has noble intentions. It is an action/sci-fi PG-13 flick with a relatable subplot, decent action sequences, an unoriginal yet entertaining sci-fi concept, and a whole cast and crew that believes in it and gives it their all. And that includes Mogwai’s brilliant soundtrack.

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    What Happened to Monday (2017)

    Seven identical sisters are being hunted down in an overpopulated world where all families are limited to one child.

    Noomi Rapace brilliantly portrays all seven identical sisters in this action flick that, overall, looks like Orphan Black (2013) meets Minority Report (2002) meets The Matrix (1999). Tommy Wirkola, an expert in the comedy/horror genre [Dead Snow (2009)], takes What Happened to Monday more seriously, creating an interesting sci-fi which, interestingly enough, IMDb doesn’t classify as “sci-fi”.

    Regardless of the semantics, Netflix hit the nail on the head by buying the copyrights for this dystopian thriller. Despite its minor flaws, impossibilities, and a fair number of negative reviews, it manages to entertain and raise certain ethical, social, and political questions that, when all motives are revealed, will make you think twice about who to cast your stone at.

    Well done to the whole international cast and crew who managed to pull it off and bring out a Philip K. Dick and Isaac Asimov-like world.

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    First Reformed (2017)

    Tormented by his own past, a minister of a local congregation on the outskirts of New York counsels a young couple with deeply unsettling results for everyone.

    Paul Shrader, writer of Taxi Driver (1976), Raging Bull (1980), and more, comes back with yet another provocative film he also directs. First Reformed is not for the average viewer. It is for the patient and the one with the sheer will to understand that actions trigger incalculable reactions, whether on the planet or in the human psyche. Very slow-paced with no intention of impressing or pleasing anyone, “First Reformed”, becomes judge, jury, and executioner, standing up for the environment and God opposite religion and mankind. A character-driven story with directing that clearly defines the editing pace and acting that shows you without telling you. And the few times it does, it shocks!

    Rationalising it might not be the best way to approach it, as, other than the aforementioned, First Reformed puts sanity under the microscope and subliminally scrutinises how, unbeknownst to us, everything is connected.

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    Mandy (2018)

    Producer Elijah Wood sets up a meeting with director Panos Cosmatos and actor Nicolas Cage and they wonder: How do we pitch Mandy? They scratch their heads for a while, and then it hits them: I Spit on Your Grave (1978) meets Hellraiser (1987) – OK, that didn’t happen.

    A hippie cult and their demon rider attack a couple in their secluded cabin in the woods, savagely killing the wife and forcing the husband to watch. And all hell breaks loose…

    A psychedelic journey to a sinister world of surrealism makes acting chameleon Nicolas Cage go absolutely berzerk and pull every beloved face from Vampire’s Kiss (1988) to Ghost Rider (2007). Linus Roach is right behind him, giving it all! On the other hand, Panos Cosmatos offers a “Grindhouse” experience, including his favourite trademarks: High film grain, characters on LSD speaking slowly and in a strange manner, campfires…

    One could analyze its sequences separately and write essays on them. But that is boring, and you don’t care. There are certain films or directors (say, David Lynch) that must be watched and either left alone or processed internally. Analysis ruins it. Enjoy the experience. As for people who are hell-bent on pathologically giving negative reviews, maybe it would be best not to judge a film and rate it according to how they would have wanted it to be made. Maybe they should accept the diversity of cinematic schools of thought and realize how malleable visual storytelling can be.

    Received a five-minute standing ovation at Cannes.

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    Headshot (2016)

    Indonesian film school teaches action! Weaker than The Raid (2011) and The Raid 2 (2014), yet Headshot manages to impress with its realistic action. Still gory, phenomenal fighting sequences, still bloody killings, still men and women who just don’t go down, still Timo Tjahjanto, Iko Uwais, Sunny Pang, Julie Estelle. You can’t go wrong.

    A man who has washed ashore with amnesia is trying to figure out who he is and what has happened to him while his past is hell-bent on wiping him out. The R-rated, Indonesian version of The Bourne Identity (2002) will not fail you and will prepare you for when the aforementioned team strikes back with The Night Comes for Us (2018) – the most brutal in this action saga yet.

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    Incident in a Ghostland (2018)

    A house invasion causes a mother and her two young girls an unspeakable physical and psychological horror.

    Have you ever heard of it? I am afraid it is one of the “limited release” casualties that went under the radar. I guess it didn’t please the right people… but I sure hope it scared the crap out of them…

    After Martyrs (2008) and The Tall Man (2012), Pascal Laugier comes back with the psychological horror Incident in a Ghostland, only to project, once again, his terrifying vision on the darkness of the human psyche. The shock will hit you from the opening sequence. Two brutal invaders attack a mother with her two little daughters the night they move into the house they inherited. I say no more. A constant interchange between drama and horror follows, leading up to a non-linear, ceaseless, inescapable torture.

    Hauntingly brilliant performances, sadistic unfolding, and a breathless twist are solid reasons to spend an hour and a half… in the dark.

    P.S. My warmhearted wishes to actress Taylor Hickson, who got injured while filming and received several stitches.

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    Wonder (2017)

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    Stephen Chbosky does his wonder once more – yes, pun intended. Following the mind-blowing The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012), he now pens the screenplay and directs Wonder. In a nutshell, a homeschooled child suffering from mandibulofacial dysostosis, also known as “Treacher Collins syndrome” (facial deformity), attends a public school for the first time, entering the 5th grade.

    Julia Roberts and Owen Wilson do an amazing job as the parents who struggle as much as their kid, and Jacob Tremblay, being the kid, proves again he is a prodigy child actor. Izabela Vidovic, Daveed Diggs, and all the child actors shine in front of the camera, with everyone knowing who they are playing and why.

    Wonder is the side of Hollywood which gives hope that studio films are not all about undermining human intelligence, explosions, or exploiting disabilities and minorities for profit. Its plot and subplots are bound together proportionally, creating a perfect equilibrium. It recognizes talent, maneuvres around and delicately avoids buffoonery, soppiness, kitsch and cliche, and definitely recognizes a$$holes when it sees them, in every shape, age, race or form.

    Get carried away and let it appeal to your humanity. As reality is, unfortunately, far more inhuman…

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    The Nun (2018)

    Rrrrriiiiiiiggggghhhhtttttt… At first, I couldn’t tell if I was getting old or if the jump scares were getting old. But… what if it was something else? Then, by the process of elimination, I started crossing out factors. But that didn’t make much sense either. Individual departments worked well on their own. Directing, cinematography, production design, editing, acting… Hold on… And then it dawned on me… It was the story! Or the lack thereof, to be precise.

    In The Exorcist (1973), Pazuzu, the demon that possesses Regan, gradually unfolds certain abilities: It controls her body and mind, launches things around in a telekinetic manner, reads her and everyone else’s soul, speaks every language under the sun (even the dead ones), and, upon being cast out, can possess someone else. Please see Exorcist II: The Heretic (1977) for unnecessary complexities and their outcome.

    In The Nun, Valak can do all of the aforementioned plus… whatever the hell the studios decide that it’s convenient for the script. So, it always comes down to the bloody script! There is this side of Hollywood with the inexplicable mentality of a “financial shark” where, the moment producers “smell” success in something – The Conjuring (2013) and The Conjuring 2 (2016) – they “attack”, blow it out of proportion, rip it apart, and move on to the next!

    The Nun suffers from inscrutable improbability. As if it isn’t hard enough to specify the demon’s abilities, the ghosts (wtf?!), the heroes’ choices and actions, and an entirely fictitious chapter in an otherwise “based on true events” saga come into play, amounting to a head-scratching, eye-bleeding nothingness beyond comprehension.

    Producers: Stop seeing filmgoers as financial dairy cows and films as cheap canned food for mass consumption. I guess you are making money anyway, so why care…

    Below, you can find my top 3 quotes on scripts. Maybe I’m not such a stuck-up snob after all.

    • Audiences are harder to please if you’re just giving them effects, but they’re easy to please if it’s a good story.” — Steven Spielberg.
    • “To make a great film you need three things – the script, the script, and the script.” — Alfred Hitchcock
    • “You can’t fix a bad script after you start shooting. The problems on the page only get bigger as they move to the big screen.” — Howard Hawks.

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