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    Fast & Furious 9 (2021)

    Dom and his “family” reunite once more as his unknown to everyone else younger brother has teamed up with a terrorist group to initiate a weapon of mass destruction.

    Muscles, guns, explosions, supercars, and spies… all in the mix for a global audience of specific age. F9 did what most of its predecessors also did in previous years. It exceeded every unrealistic expectation! From The Fast and the Furious (2001) to Fast and Furious 8 (2017), whoever follows the saga sees the gang first forming with the intent to steal and sell VCRs and DVD players and end up driving against submarines. Each instalment has been seen getting crazier and crazier, and the level of believability has been dropping exponentially. Now, it’s facing a free fall. A free fall of 2 hours and 25 minutes; the longest Fast & Furious in the franchise.

    Where do I begin… Dom’s initial refusal to participate has been a cliché for a couple of decades now. One would expect that writers would have moved on in the third decade of the 21st century. Apparently not. Then, as the previous films did, this one also introduces a new weapon and/or technology. Like an uneducated Sesame Street, get to know about not even laughable rocket science and ridiculous electromagnetism here. I’m not even gonna touch on the “hacking” parts. As for this type of slapstick comedy, some might find it funny, so I’m not gonna go into it.

    To cut the long story short, let’s talk fast, without fury, about the driving. The driving and the chemistry between Vin Diesel, the late Paul Walker (RIP), Michelle Rodriguez, and Jordana Brewster made most of us fall in love with the first three or four films. Both of them are lost now. The sky-high level of implausibility, and therefore unfathomable CGI scenes, destroyed both. The filmmakers are now milking the cow and are competing with The Expendables (2010), and like most of these films, what massively irritates me is that they are undermining people’s intelligence. No film should ever undermine its audience’s intelligence. And that’s what F9 does. What was the amazing Charlene Theron thinking? A villain that didn’t even sweat. As if the non-existent, so far, Dom’s brother (John Cena) is not a gimmick enough, the rest of the antagonists are just shambles. Helen Mirren and Kurt Russel are there for the easy money, I get it. The rest… I don’t!

    To summarise, maybe, and that’s just a speculation, you might find it exciting if you are around 12 y/o. But I hope you don’t, so maybe Hollywood producers reevaluate and learn how to respect their audience. By all means, if you are into VFX and the MTV style of filmmaking, give it a go. It will make you forget the unpleasant times we are currently experiencing, anyway. But know what you sign up for. Justin Lin is a respectful director/producer but goes for the money. After the franchise is gone, I believe we’ll see something amazing from him. Something that will beautifully surprise both in terms of character and story development. Finally, I’ve said it before and I’ll keep saying it: Michael Rooker is a great actor and should be getting more screening time in everything he’s in.

    Please, don’t forget to share and subscribe. If you enjoy my work and dedication to films, please feel free to support me on https://www.patreon.com/kaygazpro. Any contribution is much appreciated and valued.

    Solidarity for all the innocent lives who suffer the atrocities of war!

    Stay safe!

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    1 Comment

    1. I have only ever watched a couple of these and I think I will leave it that way. I’m sure it will just be a very similar story anyway.

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